Thursday, January 20, 2011

The Jigsaw Puzzle

"First put the puzzle together, then see if you like it. "

Being an Uncle is about the most interesting thing in my life (outside of my head). My brother has seen fit to provide me with a diverse variety of nieces and nephews, some of whom I am close to and some not so much. There are six of them altogether, and sometimes it seems like there are many more than that.

Ranging in age from four years old to twenty-three, my nieces and nephews  provide a basically limitless array of opportunities to study and enjoy the development of human beings. From my perspective, it's a miracle that anyone actually makes that trip, let alone matures to the point that they start the process over again with kids of their own.

At the moment, my brother and Number Three are engaged in a project that comes down to putting together a jigsaw puzzle. Somewhere, hidden in the pieces of the puzzle are resolutions to issues involving transportation, money, inventory control, professional development, and several other components of the family business, their relationship and the process of turning kids (and dads?) into humans.

The benefits available to each of them are obvious, and pretty awesome. All they have to do is put the pieces together. It's just a damn jigsaw puzzle. How hard can it be?

I think it would be easier if each of them would worry less about whether they like the pieces and more about getting the puzzle together correctly.

"Oh, this piece is too big, and I want it to be a different color."

"This piece is shaped strangely. I want it to be more square with one rounded edge."

"I want to put this piece where that one goes. That one is ugly."

"This piece is lopsided, and the indentation on the right is deeper than I prefer."

Who gives a shit!? Just put the pieces together. How's this for a concept: Assemble the pieces in whatever way they fit together, then look at the whole puzzle and see what you get.

Stop bitching, start encouraging. Stop inventing ultimatums, start reaching consensus. Stop looking at the pieces from your own points of view, look at the whole puzzle from the perspective of each other's best interests. Stop finding fault, start respecting each other's strengths. Stop talking and start listening. Neither of you has come as far as you have by being idiots. Why are you doing that now?

My sister in law isn't much help. She's deep down mad at her thirty-something year old brother who isn't worth two shakes of a fat rat's ass, and sleeps on their mom's couch until noon, and contributes nothing, and has no purpose in life at all other than consuming food and producing shit. Rather than go to her mom's house and express her frustration to her shit-machine brother, she's taking her anger out on Number Two and Number Three. She can't seem to grasp the concept that my nephews are not her brother, and shouldn't have to pay for his sins. God. Women. Sometimes I'm glad I'm gay.

OK, Please excuse the vent session. I promise to get back to MIQ #2 Tomorrow. I've already outlined the next couple of posts. That puzzle is much more fun than this one anyway.