"Give 'em an inch..."
Yesterday at work was like an episode of The Honeymooners. I hate it when life makes me act like Jackie Gleason and bellow at my bro. For those of you who are unfamiliar with the sitcom from the 1950's, Gleason plays Ralph Kramden who is very short tempered, frequently resorting to bellowing, insults and hollow threats. His role became the inspiration for Fred Flintstone. He is the spitting image of my late uncle who could yell loud enough to rattle glass in the windows. The guy woulda been proud of me.
I sounded just like him when my bro handed me the receipt from the auction we participated in last weekend. I was warned that the auction contained stuff that we wanted to buy, and was prepared for them to spend $75K. The receipt (with the check stub attached) showed $162,600 and I about shit a brick!
I bitched and hollered and squealed like a stuck pig, and suggested that they HURRY to the Magic Wand store to see if my warranty replacement had arrived yet. "Gawd Dammitt! This is Halloween, not April Fool's.
"What's the point to me sitting here like Ebenezer Scrooge, stacking up the silver coins and counting them out one by one if you guys are going to play Russian Roulette with the checking account? Is this how November is going to start?"
I even bounced up and down melodramatically for effect, and I think I turned red.
And it was all an act, and my bro saw right through it and didn't buy it for a second.
Don't get me wrong. It's not a good thing that they spent way more money than the budget called for, or that they went to some steak house and spent $900 on dinner and showed up at the auction Saturday with hangovers. I do not appreciate anybody on the planet meeting me at the door on Monday morning and telling me that they took $162K out of the checking account. I don't keep that kind of money sitting around, and it isn't the best way to start my week.
It is stressful. But it is not unmanageable. I can cope with it. And thus I have the very first thing on a long list of things to be thankful for as the calendar slides into the season of Thanksgiving. Never before in my life have I been able to deal with a $85,000 surprise. I won't say I like it, but I am very aware of how things have changed for our family and business over the past few years. And it feels really good to be thankful for that.
But if they do it again, Heads Will Roll, Gawd Dammitt!