SMOKING
I haven't smoked so much since last December when I started vaping. I've always had the mindset that I'm not quitting smoking, I'm choosing to vape instead. And overall, that works really, really well most of the time. There are times when vaping doesn't cut it. First thing in the morning, I don't want to philosophize, negotiate, compromise or be reasonable. I want a cigarette, NOW! So I have one. At first, I smoked 2 or 3 real cigarettes a day. Now it's five or six and maybe more if it's a really bad day. Not sure why all of a sudden I want to smoke more, or how to fight it.
Plus, even smoking 5-6 cigs a day is a helluva lot better than two and a half packs. In context, I'm still doing really well, but I want to do better. And I was a few months ago.
WEIGHT LOSS
I'm trying not to eat too much, and concentrating on eating the right (or better) food this year. I lost over 20 lbs. and really have changed my eating habits. I went from 221 to 200 lbs. by eating better and working out. But the momentum stopped there. I don't know why. I'm still eating better and less, and I'm still working out. But I'm back up to 206 lbs. and continuing to gain. I can't figure out why or what to do about it.
If I eat less, I want to smoke more. I can't handle being hungry and wanting a cigarette all of the time. I want to lose another 20 (now 25) lbs, and have absolutely no idea what to do from here. I think I'm doing everything right for the most part, and not experiencing the results I want. Now What?
WORKING OUT
I'm still doing it, but I hate it more now than ever. I don't like my trainer very much, but am doing everything he says without complaining (too much). But I am disliking the medicine, and (see previous paragraph) and not getting anywhere. I really am getting stronger. I can easily do stuff now that I could never have done last year. I am losing fat. I am wearing clothes that I haven't been able to wear in years. There is progress from a certain point of view, but I'm not where I need to be.
The obvious answer for all of the above is, "Try Harder". If I had any more to give I would have already. Try harder is no help.
PLAYING TROMBONE
I'm having a ball. I'm loving playing again, and am not as bad as I thought I would be. But I don't have enough time to play as much as I want or progress to the level I want to be. I am doing well, but could do so much better if I could find another half hour each day to invest in this area.
My emphasis this year is "wellness and strength". I'm not depressed about my progress, but I am growing more frustrated at the slow pace. I need an answer to this dilemma, and a way to get off of high center.
And I may have found one. Stay tuned.